Secrets of Dell (Summer, 2000) ------------------------------ By Deamtime I work as tech support for Dell computers. Because of Dell's reputation and tradition for reliability and technical excellence, we recently became the biggest OEM, both domestically and internationally. Because of this fact I thought a brief article about this brand of computer might be in order. Same Computer, Different Support The first thing you ought to know about Dell tech support is its divisions. All accounts fall into one of three categories: HSB (home and small business), PAI (public and international), and Relationship (large company accounts). Different divisions have different support policies and boundaries. Most computers are in the HSB category. Computers in this category have a "magic 30 day" window from their ship date. PAI accounts are mostly government and education accounts. I haven't had any experience with the Relationship accounts so I won't talk about them. General Dell Info All Dell BIOS chips are branded with the computer's service tag. Service tags are fivedigit (some new computers have seven-digit tags) alphanumeric identifiers of the specific computer. The database lists all of the information about the components and software that the computer shipped with. It also lists most of the owner's information, including the credit card info. This database is a simple SQL database with laughable security. It also, until recently, has been run off of Compaq Tandem servers. Go figure. The service tag is imprinted into the BIOS for the purpose of identification in the case that the computer is stolen. It can also be found on a sticker on the case. Dell, like most major OEMs, purchases special versions of most system components. If you see, for instance, an advertisement for an SB Live! card and order one for your Dell the features are likely to be different. Also, many of the cards now have an EPROM chip on them that records the last time diags were run and the results. I don't know how much storage is on the chips or what else they may record, but it isn't unlikely that they store information about the operating system, configuration, or any of a host of other "diagnostic" information types. The "Magic 30 days" After HSB computers ship, they are under a "total satisfaction" warranty the first 30 days after. My advice is that anything you are likely to do with the computer, do within the first 30 days. If you are going to install Linux on the box, do it then so that if you are unable to tune any specific driver to your liking (or even if you end up damaging components with "risky" code) you can get a replacement for that component or even for the full system. During this time you can also get upgrades to most components at cost. (This means "really cheap.") After this 30-day period most computers are covered by a year's worth of onsite warranty (although you can also purchase two additional years of this warranty). If you don't want some stranger coming over to your house and fiddling around in your system (not a bad choice, from what I've seen of their work), you have the option of replacing the part yourself. If you take this option you will be asked for "collateral information," which is generally your credit card info. If you refuse to give it to the tech, they will have to get manager approval to send out the part anyway. (Generally, this is pretty easy to do.) The reason for the collateral info is that Dell almost always wants the defective part to be shipped back to them. This aids in issue tracking and also allows for refurbishing. Almost all parts sent out in this manner will be refurbished. You can request that new parts be sent to you. (This also requires an approval, which will almost never be granted if there is no collateral info.) I've seen this become an issue most often with monitors, which go through almost no testing before being reissued. The next two years generally are "parts only" service. This service follows along the lines of the above requested self-install. Classified Drives PAI accounts differ from HSB accounts in several ways. First off, PAI customers do not have to troubleshoot over the phone. They also have the option of "classified drives." A classified hard drive is one that is suspected to contain sensitive information. These drives are most often in the Department of Defense, although any PAI customer may claim one. There is no record on the service tag of which computers have classified drives. These drives, when defective, are destroyed on site and are not returned to Dell. You have to inform the technician that you have a classified drive, as they will not ask. ZZTop All Dimension computers come with a compressed drive image on a hidden partition. The only certain way of absolutely getting rid of this partition is a low level format. This "hidden" partition isn't a partition at all. The image is written at the end of the drive. The executable program "ZZTop" finds, expands, and writes this information to the drive, much like Norton's "Ghost" program. Many images are coming out of the factory corrupt these days (see the "Dell Today" section below). If this is the case and it is discovered within the first 30 days, you have the option for an STM CD. This CD contains the same information. If you decide to use the STM as a system maintenance utility, make backups of both the CD and the floppy that comes with it. If either one fails past the first use, you will not only get no sympathy, but no replacement. support.dell.com All technical information, from pin-outs to jumper settings, white papers to driver files, on all Dell components ever shipped (including 8086s - seriously) can be found at the support web site. The search function is a little sketchy but with a bit of persistence you can find any information that you might need. SE Tech Support "Acts of God" are not covered under the HSB warranty. If a lightning storm took out your modem, for the love of all that is good don't tell the technician. As soon as that is entered into your log, that part cannot be replaced by any technician. All phone techs have a badge number to identify them. Make certain you get that number and use it whenever referring to the tech in your communications with Dell. All branches of support have five-digit extensions to their queue. Get that number and watch your call times plummet. Don't mention that you are taping a call; you will be hung up on immediately. Don't threaten legal action. Your tech support will be suspended completely until the legal department reopens it. (Only method of contact with legal? Surface mail, naturally.) Also, don't just stop making payments on your computer expecting that Dell will repossess it. Instead, they will take you to court, usually filing in a federal court (interstate commerce) in North Dakota, or Hawaii on a Wednesday. They give minimum notice, usually down to the minute and almost always win. I have heard that they are able to garnish wages and totally destroy credit for years. Dell Today Redhat has started shipping on some Dimension desktops. Support is by Linux Care. The Dimension line seems to be plagued by unreliable modems. Do not under any circumstances order any Conexiant modem on a Dimension. Dell has terminated its contract with Conexiant and will stop shipping their POS when they run out of stock. I have seen examples where a customer ordered a USR hardware modem and got a Conexiant instead. Read your invoice carefully. If this happens to you, call customer service. Because of the increase in sales, the computers are not being burned in any longer at the factory. I have seen instances that make me doubt that they have even been turned on. Loose or unseated cards are not uncommon (sometimes even processor or RAM). Neither are unconnected power or data cables. Misinstallations of software and poor backup images are also common issues. Burn in your computer when you first get it. This article didn't mention anything about laptop or server support. I don't know much about those divisions. All I can guess is that they are much the same as we are. Have fun with your Dell and, hey, have fun with Dell too!