Needless to say, I was less than impressed with Defcon V. This has to do with a lot of things though, so don't get the wrong impression; there were a lot of good things too. So here's my take....

Fruity, Crash and I set out early Friday morning from the southern-most armpit of Hell, Yuma. More or less it was an uneventful drive to Vegas from there, so I figured I would catch up on my beauty sleep. Somewhere right before Needles, California there is this hill that curves up to the left and right at the top of it curves sharply back down to the right. Well, as I woke up right before this dastardly hill, fruity must have been doing Mach 1 and we literally launched his car from one lane to the next and practically shoved my head through the roof of his car. Finally we got to Vegas and made our way through hordes of traffic to the less than magical Aladdin Hotel and Casino (didn't this place appear in an episode of Full House..the one where Jesse and Becky secretly plan to get married? But I digress...). Since the hotel wouldn't let us check in, we scoped the place out and at in some fine little diner near the back of the Casino. While we were there we were practically robbed blind for some freshly squeezed Crystal Light lemonade and some under cooked frozen french fries. Finally the rest of the TDYC clan started to arrive little by little. First we saw _NoX_ and a few others, then Rev. Krusty, TrueCynic, Relix, NightChsr and a few others started popping up.

So we all got registered and boy what a pleasure that was. Admittedly, by the time I registered, there wasn't a very long line at all, but it would have been nice to have my info taken into some sort of database for future mailings and stuff dealing with Defcon and future events. Next, I get this lame-ass badge that has this fluorescent yellow striping on and a place for me to put my name with a marker? Then, after paying the $40.00 dollars, my damned badge clip thingie breaks on the back!?! The guy at the end was gracious enough to sport me some (barely any) super glue type adhesive that didn't keep my badge on for more than 2 minutes. Well, we finally get up to our room and admittedly, the rom was kick ass! We just happened to luck out and get on the 14th floor in a room that had a balcony with chairs and the whole 9 on it. It was cool. So, Fruity must have been living on too much Josta or something because he thought he was part of the "World's Strongest Man" Competition because he ripped the dresser away from the attached wall to access the phone lines and so we could use some other lines without being charged. It was all that and a bag of chips when we found a plethora of lines behind there. As it would go, we all had our shirts distributed a bit later and in force we entered the scene. First person I ended up seeing was TekLord. This callous ass was in my face like he wanted to slip me the tongue or something He was really annoying. Next Aychbee (pronounced: H.B. ie: HexBug) found us and introduced himself to us. He was cool and shit and he and Fruity took off to pack away a lot of the alcohol that was purchased prior to leaving Yuma. The rest of us looked around and met different people and things of that nature. We met The Dark Tangent and Penguina and watched Hacker Jeopardy and laughed a lot... Aychbee called Br0k3n at his job in Cali and made plans to have us put over the radio airwaves around 2am via our Phreaked phone. A few hours later PbS, sbL, skeet and April all showed up and we went and got grub down the street at this way fancy McDonalds *smirk*. It was all good and I did over-react a little when I found out that Aychbee was dialing 911 in a drunken stupor from one of our phones. Everything worked out all right. It seemed odd however to see tons of people getting busted and taken out of their rooms when we were being equally as destructive to ours. Finally one time, after some FUCKING ASSHOLE a few floors up decided it would be funny to drop a full coke can out of the 28th or so floor down to the balcony right next to ours. the police came to our room and said we were making too much noise!?! How? Maybe they heard us bitching about the can being thrown down almost possibly smiting one of us, ...... So, while everyone wanted to drink and party, me being the tired working fool that I am, Crash and I went up and went to sleep up in Rev. Krusty's extra bed.

So Saturday came and we went to some cool lectures and some boring ones. Fruity, this chick and I went to this place on the outskirts of Las Vegas to go buy a small duck. Yes, a duck. It seems a live duck was worth 20 pts in the Scavenger Hunt so we decided that we could buy one and Fruity's lil sister could take care of it when we got back to Hell. We named it: Jimmy the Hotdog Vendor. We snuck the duck into the Casino and put it in the tub in Rev. Krusty's room. Needless to say, it was kind of hard to keep the the cleaning crews out of our room all weekend. But we did. Also, the duck would quack it's head off whenever the light was on in the bathroom. I'm sure that when we were taking a piss it thought our dicks were it's daily feeding from dear mommy mallard. The Scary thought is, knowing Rev. Krusty's fetishes of Crisco (butter flavor) and small feather animals, that Jimmy found out how Rev. K's teepee really stays up.... But we had a blast Saturday night and talked to a whole lot of people. It seems that a lot of people stopped by our room because it somehow got on a list of rooms with Party's in them. And even when we put a sign on the door saying where the party was, and that it wasn't in our room, they STILL came in! Again, Crash, Fruity, Rev. Krusty, and I all crashed out in Rev.'s room. Sunday was pretty uneventful. We got all kinds of free stuff and Rev. K got up in front of Everyone and spotted Dark Tangent as a FED! We had all kinds of reasons, and it was just cool. We were all bushed and stuff. April, Skeet, Crash and I headed out around 2 or 3pm for Hell, and the rest of everyone else came back at some un-Godly hour. Overall, I think that Defcon was run kinda of by the seat of it's pants. It Needed to Be run a bit better and stuff. Other than that, it was a blast. I can't wait until next year!