You gotta problem? If I wanna say “Merry Christmas” to Holiday Shoppers, I will dammit. Now go stick your anti-Christian Jew Spew up your fat butt and eat some hot lead! Movie still from “Tremors.”

WELCOME TO INCOG MAN’S FIRST ANNUAL, TOTALLY TASTELESS AND POLITICALLY INCORRECT GUIDE TO GUN BUYING THIS CHRISTMAS SEASON!

For that special man or woman in your life (or me if you want). I just hope I don’t ruin any surprises planned for Christmas morning — or night. Plus, for all those hormone pill-dropping, strap-on-wearing Bull Dykes who like to come by my blog for vicarious thrills — you might enjoy this a lot too. Don’t say I never did anything for you.

And to all you Feminazis out there who click on the “read the rest” button and get all torqued-up — don’t worry, I already know I’m a pig.

So maybe I’m not Mr. Class Act all the time. It’s tough being a half-way decent, but still red-blooded White male in America today and all too easy being a complete pervert. Know what I mean? I also am quite aware that I may not the best guy to turn to for gun advice, or women advice, for that matter. But, put the two together, I think you might have a little fun. Ladies and gents, for this Holiday Season, try to make sure you pack some heat. Get a gun, too.

Uh, I’m not exactly sure what kind of gun this is… but I sure do like her sense of patriotism!

Man, this girl has some really big mags!

A great stocking stuffer, the three-point combat sling will keep her weapon free from “entanglements.”

Damn! And I thought they outlawed bayonet lugs on boots?

If “Global Warming” means less clothes, then I say forget the damn Polar bears.

Remember: Christmas presents sure can come in handy — especially when any local sub-Saharans show-up instead of Santa.

What did you say, Negro? You talking to me?

With just one hand, this lovely lass can handle a little pump-action…

…while some ladies prefer to use a firm, two-handed grip…

…because “Gun Control” only means using both hands.

Still didn’t hear you, Negro!

I sure as hell don’t know what this mean-looking little hellion is wielding, but I’ll try to stay on her good side.

For unsafe gun handling, this girl deserves a little “Extremist” discipline!

Here’s a close-up view on the proper way to wear a gun belt — especially around my house.

My kind of “little sniper.” Shhhwing!

OK Feds, you got me. I give up. Just let me do the frisking!

Some hunting trips are better than others. Even if you never leave camp.

Good fire control is so important when out hunting down local varmints.

What did you say about all this, Jewboy?

Too slow, Nation Wrecker!

– INCOG MAN